Creating Space & Lifting Voices
The Preamble
That’s right… it’s time for my semi-annual / annual discussion with you guys on thoughts that come to mind regarding black history and my perspective on what it feels like to be a black woman in America. For those of you who are wondering, yeah it’s still a struggle even in 2020. BUT before we get into all of that…
Hi! For any new readers, my name is Emi and I am a Nigerian, British, American gal in my 20s. Each day I’m trying to live my ‘best life’ in every gifted moment as I spend time with my family, friends, traveling the country for work and with my church community. I’m so SO glad you’re here reading and hope you’ll stick around for all the fun! I have a passion for food, travel, and sharing my life experiences. There’s a ton to explore, so let’s get into the topic of the hour!
As I mentioned earlier, I’ve said quite a bit - through different phases of life these last 4+ years - on what some of my personal and unique experiences have been being black in America. For additional context on where I’m coming from and some of the experiences I’ve had, click any of the links at the end of this post for additional reading / context. Today I want to focus on one central message, so let’s dive right in!
Creating space for black voices
Through growing up in America and spending significant time abroad I have seen various shades of discrimination and racism. From outright statements of me being “a good one of my kind'“ to subversive compliments of being “nicely lighter skinned”, there are a multitude of ways in which living in my own skin has felt like a trap. Known or unknowingly, statements like these - even ones that are supposed to come across as compliments - trigger long-standing stigmas & negative societal constructs. They stifle individuality & repress unique and diverse voices.
For some (especially in corporate america), I am seen as too black to relate to and for others not black / Nigerian / African or African-American enough. Often times, I have to start working against stereotypes and preconceived notions as soon as I walk into a room. Imagine feeling like you always need to be “on” or striving to receive baseline acceptance for who you are. Not positive perceptions, but merely neutral and fair outlooks to who you are and what you can bring to the table. Living like this is exhausting. It’s scenarios and environments like these that can restrain and silence voices.
So what do we do about it? Decide to make conscious choices that help to uplift the voices and value of EVERYONE around you. Yes, I mean YOU! None of us have to be a CEO, influencer, athlete, or global leader to effect change. Meaningful impact can happen at a personal level when we as individuals choose to invest in our spheres of influence. From the classroom, to the gym, workplace, and beyond - elevating the voices of those who may not look like us helps to expand our understanding. Better yet, it helps us to live in greater harmony.
I once had a close-ish acquaintance who was uncomfortable by the way I was being treated at work, but instead of choosing to do something about it she stayed silent. While I understand the fear she had in speaking up and discomfort she was looking to avoid, what she may never know is how her unwillingness to stand up for me in those moments perpetuated a culture of discrimination. Was she the one treating me poorly? No. Did she help to rectify the situation? No. Sometimes our silence is not just our own….it can silence the voices and cries for help from those around us.
While that season of my life was extremely difficult - you can read more about it here - I don’t share this story to guilt anyone. I share it as a call to action for each of us to examine what it is we believe, hold dear, and are willing to tolerate. My goal is to find avenues to elevate black voices while learning to be unashamed in raising my own. I long to see a world where people are treated and judge by their work ethic and merit, not the color of their skin - be it black, white, yellow, purple….you get the picture. That way, when all is said and done I’ve lived my life with no regrets. I’ll know that I lived a life where I chose to see the potential and good in people. I hope you will to.
Closing sentiment
While there is not one (or even ten) quick fix to making our day-to-day lives more inclusive, each of us has the potential to help empower and raise the voices of those around us. I hope you enjoyed this post and maybe even found it enlightening! For similar content, check out some of my older posts within this subject matter space:
Thank you so So much for making it all the way to the end of this post. I know it was a long one, but a topic that is personal and tangible for me. Much love to you and best wishes until next time ♡
“Prejudice is a burden that confuses the past, threatens the future and renders the present inaccessible.”
— Maya Angelou